Cultivating Successful and Healthier Relationships

I woke up today feeling rejuvenated with new energy. I took the moment to meditate briefly; inhaling and exhaling deeply for 10 times. I felt my mind and body, opening up and letting go off emotions I had been internalising or hold onto for a while. 


I learnt a deeper level of appreciation and gratitude. To appreciate what I have now, such as: 

• Being born in a country (UK) and the opportunities I have benefited from life 

• To appreciate that although I was recently diagnosed with a chronic pain condition and numerous symptoms, that I am alive, able to breath and walk and use my hands freely. Sometimes, it is understandably easier to deeply internalise our own pain and suffering to the point that we are unable to value and appreciate the greater things in life.

• To take the time to observe, listen and learn more from people before judging them too quickly.

• All Relationships do grow, change and heal overtime; no matter what the circumstance is.  

•  The more you grow as a person, the more effective you become in managing your emotions and letting go off anger. If you are not growing and pushing past the things that have happened in the past, then you are likely to remain stagnant and not develop. 

• Learn to grow as an individual, try not to respond with violence or anger (although sometimes it cannot be helped). For instance, understand that the person you are caught up in an intense dialogue with may be going through their own personal challenges. Moreover, that their behaviour is temporary and does not make them the person who they are 100% of the time.

• Learn to focus on the little things in relationships that you value the most about the individual/or your partner, rather than on the major arguments. For instance, what initially attracted you to them in the first, i.e. their caring nature, or what they may do for others etc…  

• What you put into any form of relationship is what you get back. To learn how to upgrade your own communication and persuasion skills, so that you can be in the position to lead by example. When you are able to manage certain situations, others may learn from you. May also start to change.

• Learn to share ideas rather than internalise them, up to the point that you feel like exploding.  

• It is more important to be self-fulfilled first, as an entity rather than waiting for someone else to fulfill you; otherwise you will never feel complete as an individual. It is about owning your own stuff and accepting your own behaviors. Like attracts like. When you own it, your behaviour (rising above and overcoming), you are likely to engage with like minded individuals.

• To understand that life is about abundance and engaging with more people, rather than being focused on one individual and waiting for them to accept you, fall in love with etc... When you learn how to attract and attain, new relationships (i.e. approaching new people in daily situations in your own environment/community); you learn the laws of attraction. Moreover, you learn how to leverage and scale new potential relationships by getting to know individuals more deeply on a friendship level first, through chemistry rather than on a superficial level.

• Life is about passing moments: To accept rejection as part of life, as individuals do change and evolve over time. People transcend and they do move on. Learn to experience the journey, by doing so learn you learn to accept change and can adapt more easily in life.

• Those you spend with can be the person you become. Such as being with friends who may think that for instance that, ‘all men are evil.- as a generations. You may start to think the same, or inherit friendship or family believes of what relationships are about. What they are imparting on you is their own personal experiences and challenges.

• Lastly, we cultivate the relationships we want. It starts with us and we can be more successful at attracting others on a higher and deeper level.

• Fun and spontaneity is essential: To try new things when dating, such as going for a walk, picnic, visiting art galleries, or museums; being in environments where you get to know each other more.

• If you want a serious and long lasting relationship, you have got to wait. For instance, value more what it means to kiss a new person for the first time. Build tension up first and don't rush through the process of relating and getting to know each other person on a deeper level. Through that experience, you will get to know their behaviours, moreover be able to determine if you whether there in it for the long run.

• Again try not to limit yourself to one individual, develop many relationships, as in ‘friendships.’ Less of the tinder flicking, yes/no through pictures and more engagement in person.  

• To understand that men and women have different ways of dealing with emotions. Women self-sooth through sharing their personal experiences on a deeper level either by seeking attention of from their partner or with friends. It takes women longer to process emotional things. Men tend to not share their emotions, and may find other ways of self-soothing; they may disconnect if a discussion becomes intense. Are able to let go emotionally, sooner rather than later. Sometimes, it is better to stop a discussion to pick it up at a later stage.

There is so much more, I have learnt. I could go on this topic. The above information is based on generations overall of how the male and female population may respond to different situations. 

It was understood that we as individuals have different levels of emotional responses. It was more about learning how to understand behaviours, and accepting them as that. By doing that we can grow more on a deeper level and let go off things which may internally/misunderstand in the absence of effective communication skills

Conflict in relationships: believe it, or not is good it enables us to learn and grow as individuals. We learn overtime how to manage conflict better, when we accept people for who they are; “rather than internalising/being hurt by their temporary behaviours.”

The process of personal growth takes time, it does not happen overnight. It is about strength and character building. This simple and yet most effective morning ritual was something that we (attendees) were shown yesterday during a seminar by Ed Smith 

“The 4 Keys To the Successful Relationship You Deserve.”

I committed to waking up early to what I classify as "silly o'clock time (4am) on a Saturday morning to attend the seminar. As an insomniac this is usually the time, I tend to fall asleep (Living in Fibro World).

What I have learnt overtime is that, when an opportunity is thrown in your way take it, and I chose to take mine. I decided to attend the seminar and walked out feeling much happier and with a new layer of personal growth and development.

Moreover, I am pleased that I stayed until the end of the seminar. Ed Smith afforded us the opportunity to learn more about his own personal life journey and challenges that he has overcome. One of the attendees asked him about his daily morning ritual. Ed kindly took us through his daily mediation ritual. He asked us to close our eyes and played meditative music in the background. 

Overall, it was a very powerful experience for me. I found myself letting go off some of the pain, I had been hold onto to on a deeper level. Also, in the moment, I was able to let go off some of the chronic pain, which I suffer from on a daily basis.

Talk about a special selfie moment and my amazed look. I took the opportunity to thank Ed Smith. I experienced another layer of personal transformation, which I did not expect especially during the meditation process. I let go off my tensions and some of my chronic pain.

I met this very special lady, during the seminar. She joined me during my mini walk to Kensington Palace and Park.During the walk we reflected on what we learnt and shared our personal relationships journeys.

We also met Parisian tourists just near palace gates . I have gained a new friendship with a young Parisian lady, who has promised she will show me around Paris next time I visit; to learn more about the traditional french culture.

Relationships in terms of dating experiences:

I would personally recommend attending one of Ed Smith’s Seminars in London if you can. Moreover, staying until the end.  

 

Ed's Team & Champions 

P.S. The next topic I will share with you is on what I learnt from Ed Smith; "Why People Fail in Relationships". WATCH MY VIDEO HERE! The Champion Academy CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE! 

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NOTE: Some of the pictures and video's used in this blog are courtesy of the Ed Smith & The Champion Academy!